A Diamond in the Rough by Gavin Kearns

By Gavin Kearns

A Diamond in the Rough

“He’s our diamond in the rough” my new principal said to one of the school board members. It was late August in Pembroke NH where first year teachers like myself and those new to the district were meeting members of the school board.  My principal calling me a diamond in the rough resounded with me.

Diamonds are priceless, brilliant, expensive gems; she must really see my true potential I thought when I heard her say that. After completing my yearlong internship where I also was a long term sub, I knew I was ready for my first teaching gig.  I even thought that I could take a friend of mine under my wing who was entering the teaching profession without any experience; how could I coach him to become a better teacher?

Teachers after their internship tend to model themselves after their cooperating teacher.  I set up my room exactly like his was, a horseshoe around the room.  I thought that if I took the same format for how he structured his class mine would go exactly the same.  But why did I have issues?  Students were throwing paper balls back and forth across the room.  They were stomping on empty milk cartons to make a loud pop.  They were folding paper so that it would make a loud snap when whipped through the air.  Through the connecting door teachers would come in looking to see what the noise was and why their classroom was being interrupted with noise.

I knew that how my classroom was working was not right, but I didn’t know how to fix it.  One of the solutions that teachers use is to send students to the office that are making it a non-productive work environment for the rest of the class.  How do you respond when the office staff says “please don’t” when I tell them I am sending a problem student to the office.  They do not want to deal with the student either. I know that the administration was not to blame, but where was the support?  During the post-observation meeting with the principal, I was not given any ideas for what I needed to improve upon, or even told that I was in danger of being non-renewed.

On a oddly sunny, April day over the PA myself and the rest of the class heard

“Mr. Kearns, can you come to the office?”

“I’m in the middle of teaching” I replied.

“Ok, come during your planning period” they said.  I thought it was odd they would try and call me down in the middle of my class.  But when I went down my principal told me I was not being renewed. That was a tough moment, mostly thinking what will the rest of today be like?  The rest of the week? The rest of the year? She told me “I think you know why” and that “the kids have your number”.  She was right, I knew why, but what I wanted to know was where the support was?  Where was the here’s how to improve?

The rest of the year went by in a blur as I’ve learned they do.  It’s embarrassing being fired from a job.  You do not want anyone to know and you don’t want to talk about it.  But it’s public, how can people not know? It was awkward when students would ask why I would not be teaching the following year.  I wanted to tell them it was because of them.

I thought I’d never teach again, I sent countless resumes and went on plenty of interviews, but none came to fruition.  A single year was all I was going to make it?  What would I do for a career.  I thought teaching was what I would do for the rest of my life.

The following June I’m interviewing at for the position I’m in now.  “What was the last book you read?” the language arts teacher asked.  “Teacher Man” I replied.  This was a connecting moment between myself and my future teammates, we would get along and have similar styles, similar goals.  This past June I just finished my 5th year at Paul School as the 7th and 8th grade science teacher.  It’s amazing seeing how myself and my classroom has changed from my first to my fifth year.  The math teacher and I jokingly compete with each other on who are the favorite teachers  and subjects.  I have become a leader in the school, something I couldn’t imagine from my first year.  I am the treasurer of our local union and also on the bargaining team.  I have led professional development both in my school and at regional conferences.  At my most recent assessment from my principals, I received high marks and am now a continuing contract teacher.

I was surprised in February to see a student from my first year teaching at a play in Rochester.  It would have been easy for her to not say anything, I doubt I would have recognized her.  What does it mean when someone you used to know goes out of their way to say hi?  To say “hey remember me”?  Even though my first year wasn’t a success for me, it made enough of a difference for her to come say hi.